Helicopter Parents
We asked colleges around the country the following question:
Is it right to call the parents of high school students helicopter parents given today's complex world?
Normally, we would have a response from our college dean blogger on this issue, but unfortunately she is on vacation. Fortunately, many of the other college representatives from around the country, and others involved with college admission, were available and willing to voice their opinions.
OaktonCollege: more fairly, "helicopter parents" refers to those who intervene on grades, teaching styles, other in-class issues - not application process
apetersen: The college admission process is not the only reason they're called helicopter parents. Though I do see your point.
csuf: Helicopter parents are constantly "hovering," which is different than being helpful when they are needed. Thanks for writing.
GingerCM: Parents can helicopter all they want through the admissions process. It's a problem when they're still hovering through junior year.
JimSix: I think helicopter is used to express the psych. of the parents (customer), not deride or criticize them. Their involvement is a good thing.
ajupresident: Yes, I'm with you on that term...Helicopter Parent...as a parent I want the best for my children so why wouldn't I help in anyway I could?
DruryUniversity: Helicopter parents do more than help students apply. It's those who are involved in the student's life to an unhealthy degree.
YorkGradStudies: These kids become dependent on others & can't make decisions as adults. They need to be empowered on how to think for themselves.
CollegeBoundNet: I don't think the admissions process is that complicated at all. And parents that are too into it are indeed hovering.
MidwayCollege: Whatever sort of parent we get, overbearing or not, they are within their rights to pursue their children's admission in any fashion :)
collegeadvice: The answer is both yes and no. Parents can help, but they should try to put the student first--and not try to live vicariously
What do you think?
posted by College's View at
1:36 PM
1 Comments:
As stated repeatedly, when it comes to academics, students need to fend for themselves from start to finish, or they'll never learn to take responsibility for themselves, their work, or their actions. It's fine to ask a parent to proofread, or to ask them to provide you with financial data you might not have on them. You're REQUIRED to get that last part from them if you're not an orphan or foster kid, and as a college student, I wound up being denied financial aid for two years because my mother refused to disclose her income on a FAFSA form and told me outright I'd have to commit fraud to get financial aid, by either lying about my address, or lying about her income, because she wanted me to drop out. However, all through high school, I had to COMBAT my mother's hovering in the worst ways imaginable, including taking over my own education by the age of 14 (and teaching myself education law, education theory, applied psychology, disability law, and various other concepts taught at the graduate and post-graduate levels that I had no choice but to learn in order to make sure I graduated high school without her interference landing me in an institution). Thankfully, most helicopter parents DO have the best intentions for their kids, and aren't lying to their doctors to get their teens prescribed chemical restraints, or lying at IEP meetings in attempts to get their kids forced out of appropriately-challenging courses that they actually enjoy. However, students with disabilities do have that disadvantage, 6 times out of 10, because these parents just refuse to recognize that their kids are capable, and they blame the disability, saying "It's alright, you don't have to succeed, you can just give up."
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